(this actually came from a joke page on the Craig Charles (Lister) home
page.

-Mixed metaphors are a pain in the neck and should be thrown out the
window. 

-Subject and verb always has to agree. 

-Do not use a foreign term when there is an adequate English quid pro quo.


-It behooves the writer to avoid archaic expressions. 

-Do not use hyperbole; not one writer in a million can use it effectively.


-Avoid clichés like the plague. 

-Placing a comma between subject and predicate, is not correct. 

-Parenthetical words however must be enclosed in commas. 

-Consult a dictionary frequently to avoid mispelling. 

-Don't be redundant. 

-Don't repeat yourself or say what you have said before. 

-Remember to never split an infinitive. 

-The passive voice should not be used. 

-Use the apostrophe in it's proper place and omit it when its not needed. 

-Don't use no double negatives. 

-Proofread carefully to see if you have any words out. 

-Hopefully, you will use words correctly, irregardless of how others use
them. 

-Never use a long word when a diminutive one will do. 

-Avoid colloquial stuff. 

-No sentence fragments. 

-Remember to finish what